Sales Negotiation Training | The 5 Secrets of Successful Negotiators

The points described in this section aren't secret in the sense that you'll be hearing from my sales team if you reveal them, but secret in the sense that they just don't occur to most people. Here are five important pieces of information without which truly successful negotiation is impossible.

Secret 1 : Get around the Rules

From the beginning, we are all taught to obey the rules. For most of us it starts in school and pretty much never ends. Remember? “Color inside the lines!” “Raise your hand before you speak!” ”Get a gold star if you obey the rules; get a demerit if you don't.”

Maybe these rules made for an orderly classroom, but they also seem to have set up a conditioning process by which we tend to accept rules without question – even when they don't make much sense. The beat goes on in adult life with such gems as “Don't Even Think of Parking Here!” “Do not Enter!” “Payment must be received by……”. There are enough conditions on the back of any airline ticket to make you wish you took the bus. Even rental videos and DVDs start out with a needlessly ominous FBI warning!

By adulthood, we are such compliant souls that we often sign agreements that contain rules to which no one in their right mind (if they bothered to read the microscopic print) would agree. One of my favorites is on the back of various retail and credit agreements. It says some version of the following: “In the event of a dispute, you the customer agree to pay all reasonable legal and court fees incurred in the settlement of that dispute.” Translation:” If we disagree, I hereby treat you, the vendor, to a free lawsuit!” When I question such nonsense, I often hear, “Nobody ever questioned that before.” That's always a good sign.

As if all these rules weren't enough of an outrage, they are often enforced by an army of bureaucrats whose chief function is the utterance of such lines as “It's the policy or it’s procedure.”

Secret 2 : Go Straight To the Top

The most skilled negotiator won't get anywhere if he or she is talking to the wrong person – a person with no authority to make changes in the status quo. If the individual you're talking to is (1) behind a window, (2) wearing a name tag, or (3) has a title that begins with the word “assistant” you are talking to the wrong person. You need to get to the real decision maker rather than someone whose job it is to keep you from talking to the right person.

Most of the people you will meet at the cash register, at the front desk, or even in the complaint department are likely to be earning just above minimum wage for a position with below-minimum authority. The give and take that is required in any kind of negotiation is impossible in the sea of rules in which these functionaries swim. This situation is rampant from retailers to phone companies to banks to chain operations of all sorts.

No matter how politely you ask if there is someone else you can talk to, your question is still likely to come off as something akin to “You're not worth talking to. Is there someone else around here who can get things done?” Either you get a curt” No, I`m the only one here,” or the employee you're speaking to retreats to the back room and, in briefing his or her higher –up on the situation, translates your request into” I hate to bother you, but there`s some jerk out there who won`t take no for an answer! “That's hardly a good posture from which to begin negotiating.

Here is how I make sure I get to talk to the decision maker: If I'm in the furniture section of a department store and I want to talk to someone beyond the floor personnel – someone who can get things done – I will go to another part of the store (or come back during shift, if it's a small place) and say something like, “I have gotten such great service from the furniture department, I wanted to write a letter and maybe get certain people a raise or promotion. Whom shall I contact? In response to that question, most functionaries will give you all but the CEO's cell phone number… and sometimes even more.

Secret 3 : Don’t Get Angry, Get Action

Once you meet with the decision maker, you improve your chances of success by being a person with whom it is pleasant to negotiate. If you have a legitimate complaint, being confrontational (as in loud) or obnoxious (as in spewing demands) makes the issue your behavior instead of the matter you want to negotiate. You won't have much of a chance of getting what you want if the decision maker has to manage two problems – your behavior and the negotiation – instead of one.

Obnoxious people also arouse that I`m not going to take that from him (or her) mentality, which, at the end of the day, is going to get you less than if you had presented the problem firmly and politely to the decision maker. If negotiation fails, there may be a need to become confrontational, but keep that as an option rather than an initial method of approach.

Secret 4 : Never Negotiate in A Crowd

In a formal negotiation setting where both the gathering and the issues are large, crowds maybe unavoidable, but informal negotiations (one-on-one with minor issues) should be a private affair. Successful negotiation means that someone is going to make a concession – something no one likes to do publicly. If you're going to try to get a better price on a purchase – be it in a store, a flea market, or an auto showroom – do it in private. If anyone but you and your target can hear the conversation, don't even think of negotiating. If other customers hear what's going on, they'll want the same deal. If another salesperson is around, you might fall prey to a pair of salespersons plating a game of “nail the customer” in which you are the prize.

You already know enough not to ask for a raise in a crowded elevator. No employer is going to say yes if doing so is going to create an avalanche of “me too” requests. As a negotiator, you can't get what you want in any of these situations unless you do it privately. Talk to the boss, the merchant, or whomever you negotiate with in private, and, whenever possible. Do it on a one-on-one basis. Having more than one party present gives the appearance of “ganging up” on the target, and needlessly increases the pressure felt by your fellow negotiator.

Secret 5 : Give in Order to Get

A common misconception about negotiators is that success means walking away with all but their target's shirt, leaving that only out of pity for their hapless prey. The truth is that effective negotiators give in order to get. The trick, however, is to give away something that’s of little or no value to you but of some real or imagined value to your target.

For example, if I want a better price on an airline ticket or a service upgrade, I'll often begin with something like “I know you didn't come up with this price yourself, and I'm sorry to bother you with it, but if you'd take a look at ….” After hours of facing, I'll-never-fly-your-crummy-airline-again crowd, that bit of recognition and respect (which costs me nothing) has gotten me a lot of upgrades. In this instance, I gave up an intangible (recognition) and received a tangible benefit in exchange.

At other times, you may need to give a tangible item to gain a benefit. In those cases, take a close inventory of what you have to give in order to find a tangible that the other side will value, but that you can easily do without. As a customer, you might consider swapping an extended warranty for a lower price, particularly if you intend to replace the purchase before that warranty expires. As a vendor, you might offer extra service or an exclusive hotline number for that customer. (At least you can tell them it`s exclusive.)

Vendors are great at coming up with giveaways that seem substantial to customers but are of little or no cost to the vendors themselves. For example, automobile dealers lure customers with promises for “free oil changes for as long as you own your car!” At first glance, that sounds like a great deal. But think about it: If you keep the car for 5 years and maybe ten oil changes, that perk will cost the dealer less than $150. That's very little comparatively if the dealership makes $2000 profit on the car and even less if the dealer adds the cost of the oil changes to the selling price (and don't think they won't).

While negotiating, think about what you want, but also think about what you can give up in exchange. Whenever possible, it should be an intangible or tangible of minimal cost, yet the recipient should perceive it as valuable. However, it may also mean giving up a part of your initial position in order to reach the ultimate goal of all negotiation: agreement.